Renowned actress and producer, Yvonne Nelson, opens up about her strained relationship with her mother and the unresolved questions surrounding her father’s identity in her memoir titled ‘I Am Not Yvonne Nelson.’
With raw honesty and vulnerability, Yvonne Nelson takes readers on an emotional journey, driven by her deep longing to uncover the truth about her father and the profound impact it has had on her perception of her mother.
In chapter twenty-two of her thought-provoking book available to GhanaWeb, Yvonne Nelson shares a poignant account of her last communication with her mother, which took place on her birthday in 2022.
When Yvonne questioned her mother about her father, she allegedly accused her of trying to find a way to bring shame to her, as she had witnessed in her dream.
“She burst into a tirade of accusation and abuse. She told me she knew I was up to something. She said she had dreamt that I would disgrace her, and what was unfolding that morning was not new to her. I was not going to fall for any form of emotional blackmail and I made her know it. I told her she probably knew I would search and find answers beyond her words.
“To dream about it meant her God was talking to her, I told her. It was the reason she should tell me the truth so that we both bring closure to the subject. She was not ready to listen to me. The tirade continued, even after I reminded her that I had not come there to fight, the reason I came with Bible verses.
“I wanted us to talk like a mother and daughter, like two mature human beings who respected each other and saw the need to find a solution that was available. The solution was in her bosom,” she revealed.
The actress-turned-film producer and director candidly expressed her feelings of injustice and heaviness caused by her mother’s refusal to disclose the truth about her father.
Yvonne Nelson admits that her mother’s actions have tarnished nearly all the positive emotions she once held for her, as the deep-seated desire to know her father’s identity has created an emotional barrier, hindering a deeper connection with her mother.
“My mother’s behaviour has erased almost every positive feeling I had for her from my mind. Whenever I try to attach emotions to her, I am blocked by her refusal to tell me who my father is.
“When I had my daughter and experienced sleepless nights and postpartum depression, I developed great respect and appreciation for my mother. I still do. I used to call and ask her how she managed to handle this on three different occasions,” she writes.
She continues by saying that it had been more than a year since her last encounter with her mother and that their only communication had been a fleeting WhatsApp message, such as when she wished her a happy birthday.
“It has been more than a year since I saw my mother. Our last communication was on my birthday in 2022. She sent me a WhatsApp message wishing me a happy birthday: ‘Happy birthday my love. May the God of heaven continue to bless you in all your endeavours in Jesus’ name. Enjoy your day to the fullest,'” she discloses.
The memoir also includes a heartfelt apology from Yvonne Nelson to the man who was revealed to not be her biological father, Mr Okoe Nelson, who has since passed away.
She acknowledges that her words may hold little significance and the timing of her gesture may be imperfect, but she feels compelled to extend her apology nonetheless.
Yvonne Nelson recognizes the importance of acknowledging her actions and their potential impact on others, even if it may not fully rectify the situation.
“I do not know where to begin or what this apology will achieve, but I feel strongly about it. I know I have to do it. I feel I owe you an apology, even if the timing is wrong and my apology may mean nothing to you,” she writes in her memoir.
Yvonne Nelson’s memoir, “I Am Not Yvonne Nelson,” offers a deeply personal glimpse into her life, unveiling the complex emotions, challenges, and relationships that have shaped her identity. It is a courageous exploration of self-discovery, forgiveness, and the relentless pursuit of truth.