Ghanaian actress, Deborah N. Diamond, says leaving an abusive relationship is not something that is done overnight.
According to her, it’s imperative for women in abusive relationships to opt-out, adding that ‘it’s inappropriate to randomly tell the partner about that decision and hope to leave the relationship freely’.
Speaking with Mercy Bee, the Ekumfi Princess on etv Ghana’s Girl Vibes, Miss Diamond explained that most abusive men like to keep their partners around because they love to take control of them and at the same time be in love.
He stressed that for a woman to leave such a relationship, it must be done through a gradual process.
“You don’t just wake up one day, pack your bags and tell him to his face that you’re leaving. Doing that is even more dangerous because abusive and manipulative men are very wild. Once you’ve told him you’re leaving, he will find ways to pin you down. He can promise that he has changed, show you love and do all you want but when he gets you to stay, he will go back to his normal self”, she said.
She added “When an abusive man knows you love him very much, knows all your weaknesses and sees that you’re someone he can easily control, he won’t let you go. When he finds out your strengths and weaknesses, it is very easy for him to manipulate you, so you need to make your leaving gradual”.
Miss Diamond hinted those women with abusive partners must start to withdraw from the relationship emotionally, because “this will help not to fall for him again when he starts to act like a changed man to pin her down”. She advised women in abusive relationships to secure a job for themselves in order not to be dependent on their partners.
“Gradually drawing away emotionally will make it easier for you to leave and having your own source of income will keep you from having to go back to him desperately,” she said.